First year away from home

[Michelle Walsh]

Beloved Connor

I know he's not a Setter but this gentle soul was a major part of my life for over 14 years and today is his first anniversary away from home & I still miss the old man terribly. I ended up with this guy purely by accident, while taking my little sister's Guinea Pig Spike to the vets for a nail trim, I ended up with a puppy ! Con & his six sisters were left unwanted at five weeks of age at the vets all he knew was that their mother was a Border Collie & the father was a Rough Collie...he was desperate to find homes for them.

I had lost my beautiful Ceasar (Norweighan Elkhound 13 years) a year ago & was ready for another dog...Con was too cute to ignore :)

Here he is a five week old ball of fluff sharing his new bed with a teddy and little Spike. The two of them became very good friends despite the size difference and Con was always very gentle with this bossy little lady :) her fav pastime was chewing on his hair and the big softie just let her.

 

 A few months later, he's looking a lot bigger but still sharing his bed with his little lady ! Sorry the picture's a bit blurry, I'm taking photos of photos folks ! Didn't have my fancy digital camera 15 years ago :)

 

 Of all the dogs I've owned Con was certainly the most gentle and patient of beasties...just to give you an idea of his temperment, here he is chomping away on his dinner while Spike chomps away on his hair and he's not batting an eyelid. He was so smart too...never ceased to amaze me, but then I guess Collies are pretty clever dogs :)

 

 A couple of years on and Con's growing into quite the handsome chappie :) but it was about this time that he was diagnoised with epilepsy. Luckily he didn't need to go on daily meds until he was much older...he always knew when he was about to have a fit and would come over to me. Many years later and I bought my first English Setter Legolas. I had moved house and I bought Lego as company for Con. They just clicked straight away and again his tolerance and patience with this loopy young pup was lovely to see. He was a great help rearing both Lego & Theoden, speeding up toilet training & teaching manners & sharing...I was very lucky !

 Putting up with a bed hogging setter puppy...who despite having his own bed prefered to sleep with his big buddy !

 

Sharing is caring !!  Lego's trade mark cheeky look started at an early age :)

 

 Here's my baby in 2007 at one of his fav locations...Clogga Beach Arklow. When he was younger he really loved swimming. As he got older we would have to try and keep him away from the water as best we could, it wasn't good for him to get too wet. He developed arthritis, a disease I have come to truly hate. He took a very long time to get dry even with a hair drier & it wasn't good to have him damp.

 

One of my fav pictures of Connor, smiling with every part of his face :)

As the years rolled on, the arthritis became worse, we tried everything, herbal remedies, glucosamine, countless courses of cartrofen injections and towards the last two years...daily doses of metacam. However there comes a time when not even the very best of medicines can help. I knew I was probably being selfish but I did try to hold onto my baby for as long as possible. I know I'm very lucky to have had him for 14 years & 3 months, there are many people here on the site that have lost their canine companions at a very young age but still it's never really long enough...the bitter side of loving dogs. Towards the end, I'm ashamed to admit that I often cried myself to sleep, hoping & sometimes praying that my baby would pass away peacefully and spare me having to make that horrible decision again but it was not to be. His mind was still alert, his spirit was willing & his heart was strong but his body was failing him. His hearing was going, he was starting to lose his sight but it was his joints that were finall giving up.

Making the call to the vet to book a day for her  to call to the house was incredibly difficult and I was left counting down the days we had let together. Finally the day came, March 31st 2010. My dad stayed with us, he adored Connor. We tried to make his last day as great as possible, even squeezing in a short slow walk and muching on his fav boiled sausages.

When she arrived I just wanted to tell her I'd changed my mind but I knew I had to go through with it. Strange as it might sound I tried to convince myself that the injection he was receiving was just another booster so I could tolerate her doing it. But when the light went out in his eyes and his head fell heavy in my arms... I knew he was gone forever & my heart just broke. I know on some deep intellectual level I did the right thing but a year on , I still haven't quite managed to convince my heart. I think I will always feel some guilt over what I had to do, no doubt their are many other dogs owners out there that feel the same way.

 

The picture below was taken an hour before I had to say good bye to my baby...a stately elder gentleman. To those of you still reading, you have my thanks, it has been a bit helpful to write about this difficult experience and so before I upset myself further I shall finish with the last thing my baby heard before he fell sleep each night..

 

Nite, nite my love, god bless & sweet dreams...Shell loves you xxx

[colette tuite]

Thanks Michelle for sharing your lovely photos of Con with us.It doesnt matter that he wasnt a setter, he was your much loved pet. He was very handsome! Losing our lovely pets is the hardest thing about owning dogs,and it is especially difficult to have to make that awful decision. I clearly remember the day i had to make that horrible decision for my Portia 23 years ago. I took some comfort  after, knowing it was the right decision, when she stopped her laboured breathing. If you are like me you never will forget.Every day with our canine friends is very precious! Thinking of you on Cons 1st anniversary.!

[Hilary Crosswell]

What a lovely story of a beautiful dog and wasn't he just so lucky that you found him, I am sure he couldn't have had a better home or "Mum" Michelle. 

What you say is very true Colette, you never forget, I have lost 4 lovely girls over the years, I still cry for each and every one of them and they will remain in my heart forever! 

[Michelle Walsh]

Hi Colette,

Many thanks for your kind words. Indeed Con was very much loved, I guess that's what makes it all the harder to let go. I'm glad you think he was handsome :) I always thought he turned out well for a mutt :)

It is an awful decision to have to make ...the worst, I've been through it twice & no doubt it will come again in time and as you said, it's something you never forget no matter how many years have passed. If your beloved Portia was suffering, then ofcourse you made the right decision...doesn't make it any easier though and there's still heart ache. ~ Thanks again & take care x

[Angela Roberts]

What a lovely dog and so cute the pictures with the guinea pig.  Very sad to read and made me cry but I am a real softie when it comes to animals.  I have had to make hard decisions for every one of my animals, 4 horses, 3 cats and 2 miniature long haired dachshunds and 3 of my own irish setters, and then there have been all of my parents animals who I also loved so much, we have never had one die. It's hard to do but it's to give them peace and they deserve that last consideration. But today don't be too sad, be happy with lovely memories and that he had such a lovely life for such a long time.

[Michelle Walsh]

Hi Hilary,

Thanks ! I guess you could say we were both very lucky to have found each other, I always gave litle Spike special cuddles after I got Con...without her , we would never have met :)

Losing your four girls must have been terribly hard to deal with. I was too young to really appreciate the loss of my first dog but I still miss Ceasar & now Connor deeply..the passing years makes no difference so I can understand why you still cry. ~Hugs x

[Chantal McIlveen-Wright]

Hi Michelle.

What a wonderful memorial blog to your beautiful Con!!! the best tribute you can pay to your great boy for all those years of happiness you have shared together.  Like you I have only 4 legs children and like you I lost the love of my life last year (in May). I really do understand how it hurts, your pain and sorrow, your heart still being raw, and especially the most horrible moment when we have to take the decision.

Like many of us at ES, this tribute has me in tears, of course I know we were so lucky to have them, I know we have plenty of wonderful memories, but at the same time their departure is hurting so much....

Thinking of you Michelle from all my heart on this Con's first anniversary.

[Myra Thomas-Rhodes]

I'm howling, Michelle!! What a beautiful boy Connor was, in every single way. They don't come much better than that. And what a super home he had with you. Everybody who shared his life was lucky, including that gorgeous Spike.

This is a very fine tribute to him, and Connor will be keeping watch over you.

M XXX

[lyn hathaway]

oh michelle theres tears rolling onto the keyboard as i write.what a beautiful story and fabulous pictures and you have memories to treasure forever with him xx

[Cheryl Gorey]

Michelle

As I sit with tears rolling down my face, I think many of us understand the trauma of having to make that decision that haunts us afterwards.  These very special dogs never live long enough, but what a beautiful life and journey you had together.  Cheryl xx

[Howard Glansfield]

What a lovely dog and a very moving story.I don't think any of us ever really gets over the loss of our beloved dogs and nor should we.I remember every one of mine and miss them all.You have lovely memories,just treasure them for the precious things they are.

Howard